Wednesday, March 9, 2011

"Mom, whats a condomee?"

I know it has been forever! So here is my day today...
I woke up with no plans for the day-except doing Addalene's pictures for her birthday card, and grocery shopping, and making dalmas (which I never got around to) and visiting Bobby's grandmother who is in ICU, and...but otherwise a very "slow" day. While I had dinner cooking-okay it wasn't really cooking it was just sitting on the stove waiting to cook its self-Bobby was watching "Bizarre Foods"-I know I know vegans watching "Bizarre Foods (BF)", it just does not make sense. So on BF the guy goes all over the world and tries, what Americans would see as the most bizarre foods. Well on this episode he was trying cow penis stew...and Chloe walked in the room. Chloe's mind is still "innocent" up to this point and we see this look on her face as she begins focusing all too intently on the television-so we begin whispering about what is going through her head. (Now she has a brother so she knows what this body part is)
Me to Bobby "ooohhhh, thats what you do with them!" At which point we begin laughing all to hard and she looks at us completely confused. Then BF takes us on a journey to Thailand where he is going to eat at a place called...okay I do not remember the name but it was something "and condoms"-no joke. The owners goal is to spread the word on rubber, with condoms used as balloons, as hats (well replicas), in place of mints, and oh yeah IN the food!
So as I say "oh cra-"
Chloe asks, "Mom, what is a condonee?"
Me, "I have no idea what a condonee is-I gotta go cook!"
Chloe pauses then asks Bobby, "Daddy, what is a condome?"
Bobby,"Go ask your mom!"
Chloe, "Mom, what is a con...condom?"
Sigh...this was not on my to do list!
I started with, "well what do you know about sex?"
Chloe, "nothing."
Though later she told me she thought it was if you are a boy or girl.
I started simple and will not be destroying her little innocent mind at once. So for you moms out here this was my intro into future talks;
"God created sex for a man and a woman to show their love for each other,and to make babies. He intends for it to be between married men and women. Sex can spread diseases called sexually transmitted diseases, and condoms are used to help prevent those from going from one person to another-though they do not always work. There is alot to know about sex, but at your age you do not need to know it all. If your hear kids talking about it, always ask me questions. Kids tend to talk about it even though they have no idea what it is and they confuse other kids. So please always come to me if you hear anything from other kids."
Chloe, "ok, is that my plate?"
So now to plan out the next talk...


  1. lol! I'm so glad I don't have to do "that" anymore! I hate those talks! You need to watch what you watch or talk 2 will be soon!

  2. It was a COOKING show, I knew he occasionally mentioned body parts of the animals, I didn't expect there to be a condom restaurant though! We are pretty careful about what we watch too.

  3. At least she heard the version from you instead of some distorted version that she might have heard at school, if I ever have kids and need to do "the talk" I will keep you in mind and call you up because it seems like you did a pretty good job!

  4. Lol, I dont know if giggling like a 3 year old who heard the word "poop" qualifies as "a good job". But it did go alot smoother than I dreamed it would!